I’ve been battling sadness pretty hard for quite some time now. It seems all my best efforts and most solid plans have not worked out quite like I had hoped and dreamed they would. What I’d thought were solutuons have not staved off the pressing problems, and more keep piling up faster than I can fix them. The things that once worked don’t work anymore. I’m feeling old and tired and invisible and irrelevant and, yes, quite hopeless. My mortality feels too heavy for my knees to support me. And so I cook and bake and putz around in the kitchen, moving slowly and deliberately when I can, diving into new endeavors and ambitious undertakings. I see the age in my hands as I need and stir, the sieve that is my mind while I try to retain directions and focus. It’s startling, this growing old thing. I’m trying my best to embrace it, donning my apron and audiobooks, attempting to make peace with and be comfortable in this soft, saggy skin. My bread and I, I pray we both will rise. #thicketcottage #growingold #baking #cooking #bakingbread #homecooking #thriftedhome #narcissisticparent #codependency #codependencyrecovery Thank you to @Fritz for this gorgeous song.